Jimmy.Brainflush.com

Ya fucking hoo.

Me.

That’s just SO F’d UP!

Okay, Good night.

Hey everyone! Bill Adler from Utah was told by his friend Alan that I’m funny and his friend Alan who’s now my friend sends me this email that he searched yahoo and came right up with my site, and why haven’t I posted in a while?

And I said to myself a while? It’s been like 7 days which isn’t long for me but is for most and he said he FOUND ME ON YAHOO.

Then I stopped… my heart racing.. blood pumping through my veins.. I did a search for Jimmy Brainflush, and I saw the light.

Three hits, all me. Okay, so the bad news is it’s a Link to THE Old site.. so I totally figured out why he was saying this, and emailed him saying come HERE, and so he’s like, Yeay! and there’s tons more to read, so like Christmas for him and Christmas for me!

Phew.

So I have a quandry. Google, my searching savior for as long as I can recall - based on the turning yellow underarms of my very own google t-shirt, a while, is now not so great.

‘Cuz to them I don’t exist. I want to drive out to California and talk to the two dudes who were featured in a not-so-nice article in Fortune, and explain myself. Is that wrong? or the sad, trivial pinnacle of geekdom?

Freaky weirdness - someone from Jimmy’s COTSHEMA (cult of the software he manages) called him LATE in the office tonight and asked if he’d like a job JUST managing said software at said company.

Not so freaky, as Jimmy has shared with fellow cultists the joys and triumphs of Data Partitioning, database pruning, 4 seperate yet sharing datasets, Screen Painter customizations, and the like to much acclaim.

The freaky part was the 65 large part.

For real? For Jimmy? Sheeeit. Sheeit again.

What’s the catch?

The catch is Jimmy has to take some tests.

Jimmy hates tests.

Sheeeit.

65 large? Rilly?

Hmmmm..

But then I thought about the Bear, Lorrack, and all my chumlen. I thought of the Bub, and his sayings, and the Sheeit from me that the Bear and his team have put up with.

I thought about how I’ve grown as a person, professionally, socially - how they’ve helped me become a whole different person.

Then I thought about the 65 large again.

Then I said to myself, how did I get into this quandry? Seriously driving home through the snowy Star Warzed I 71 I thought, what if I fell asleep at my laptop and drooled a goober that sent electric current to my brain saying “65 Large! 65 Large!”

I did the math because Jimmy’s a ho that way, and after taxes I’d have 1800 every 2 weeks!

That freaked me out. What would I do with that much money? I’ll tell you what I’d do - buy some grade A crack cocaine and start working the street corners at night and on the weekends.

I’m kidding. Really I am.

Going Home

48 hours from now I’ll be at home in Chicago. My home is a pigsty, I have to do laundry, but I don’t care.

Christmas Wishes

To THESPNBOY - Thanks for letting me borrow your wireless connection to post this. You Rock Building 5 on the Club Drive.

To Dave - You Rock for making this site appear, but for the new year can you set a link to Jimmy on the main nothing brainflush site I’ll give you candies.
You’re still my hero though Dave.

To Nay - I know you’re hating the season right now and that it still hurts and that’s okay. Take as much time as you need but not too much, okay? I’ll be here to chat whenever you want.

To Lorrack - You’re a boss and a friend and it’s all good. 2004 will be a great year of newness, and of cleanup and quiet.

To my Brother Dave - May you find truth and honor in your pursuit of post-college employment; you deserve it, and it deserves you.

To Angela - Call me. Where have you been? Merry Christmas Sweetie.

To Malorie - I haven’t seen you but I promise to visit after I get back from Chicago, we have things to discuss and I’m sorry I’m a pudhead. May this year bring you joy and laughter and me.

To My Sister Bren - I hope this year you settle down with your man so Mom doesn’t worry so much about whether or not she’ll be seeing grandkids before too long. Also, selfishly, to relieve the pressure off of all three of us. I wouldn’t mind this being our last We’re All Single Christmas.

To Dad - You and the Judester have fun together, and I have fun with you two. You laugh at my jokes, and I see more and more of myself in you. May this year bring you less house headaches and more relaxation, and less allergy problems.

To Mom - I love you mom. May this year bring you continued peace in your life and contentment in your cozy home. I look forward to 52 Sundays of laughter and crazy goings on at your work and among your friends. I’m sure they’ll be those sad sad stories that I hate to hear but afterwards am glad because they make me very thankful for all we have.

And finally to you, reading this - May you make it your quest to find the two dudes who made Google, and get them to rank Jimmy on their site. That is your mission.

Also, you’re the one keeping this Jim Broniec real and present in Idaho, New York, Canada (Woo-Hoo!) and Switzerland. May your burdens be light this year.

I hope I can continue to make you laugh, appreciate, and enjoy life as we both go through it together.

Good night. Sleep Tight. Don’t Let the Bed Bugs Bite.