Jimmy.Brainflush.com

The weather’s perfect. The women are beautiful. Work is productive. What more could a guy ask for? From the Just Happy To Be Here Folks Department, it’s your first international Jimmy Blog entry.

The day’s running a bit long, but it has turned out to be much better than I thought it was going to be. Tomorrow should be a short day of surveying the new office which is right around the corner, thankfully, from my hotel room.

The food has been awesome. I may not understand French, but I can point at the Spaghetti on the menu and get it with a glass of water.

Ate outside of AutoWorld today, a car museum here in downtown Brussels. I’ve been working in what could pass for your family room, save for the bookcases, law books, black conference room table, and computers.

The toilets here are different than in the US. It’s a flood-system. You flood the toilet with water until satisfied that the bowl is good to go. It’s a great system once you figure it out.

Hope to head out to the Grand Place after the laptop stereo right is finished repairing itself.

Au revoir,
Jimmy

So I’m leaving for Brussels tomorrow morning. My cousin and sister both called tonight which is like a record for the ol’ answering machine, which I’ve renamed the O, you still don’t have a life. I call it that for the number of messages that are routinely there.

While I’ve moved on in my career, to my family I’ll always be the home computer fix it guy. And that’s okay with me. Because if I wasn’t, I’d never hear from these people. My cousin needed help with her WiFi router, and my sister called to wish me a safe trip. We communicate via VoiceMail, which oddly works well for us.

But back to the not having a life department - I’ve even gotten happy hearing the voices of telemarketers. I’m getting more messages from President Bush’s campaign people. I got a picture of George and Laura out on the ranch. I blame my Wall Street Journal subscription for this.

Ohio is the hotbed for this election, so we’ve been told. I feel life a left wing Undercover Agent at work - I’m surrounded by the Conservative Right - so conservative that any notions I held prior of Republican loyalty have been washed away by the constant barage of we’re right, they’re wrong, black and white descriptions.

On an unrelated note, my Bush impressions have really improved, so I’m kind of okay with him winning even though it may compromise all that we hold near and dear in the free world.

But some of them there right wingers think that Bill Clinton is the devil, and Ann Coulter is the friggin’ Virgin Mary. And, truth be told, if any of the rumors I’ve heard on the Hill are true then odds are that she is far from virginal. Close to Virginia, but FAR from virginal.
Do you ever get the feeling that some of these people, in former lives, were at Klan rallies and such? Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh. Amway, perhaps?

As I was driving home tonight from Borders I had my quiet, “Goodbye America” self speech that is new and strange having not really left the American Continent before. I’ve read and watched as much as I can about Belgium, and I am staying in a very trendy part of Brussels.

Rumor has it there are many CyberCafe’s in Europe, so I’ll try and post from these as I have the time. My dream about Big Ben a few years back seems to be leading to my taking a right out to England for a day to confirm and make that visage real.

My good friends at the coffee shop are asking about my book. I will write when I come home. I will study when I come home. Life, as I knew it, might just come back to as quasi-normal as it was.

Why aren’t we ever satisfied? I used to envy every person headed up on planes.. since I was 8 or 9 when Grandpa snuck me and my brother Dave up to the observatory at Midway airport.

I’m the anonymous guy in the Brooks Brothers suit now, Franklin planner in tow, heading off to the Next Big Thing on a Red-Eye to Europe. I’m even dare I say lusting after a foreign automobile. There’s something about the Audi A6 that makes me stare and nearly crash my car when I see it on the highway.
Our Partner in Charge of the Brussels location really wants to grow the office, and I’d like to believe that I could connect some of the technological dots to make that a reality.

Why not?

7.5 hours on a plane. Leave New York at 7:15PM, and Presto! 7 hours later it’s 8:30 in the Morning!

Call Continental a DeLorian, and me a McFly on the wall heading back to the future. Am I a dork or what?

Sleep tight in your home, dear reader. Remember to look up, because up there are all of our hopes and dreams. The satellites - man made and galaxy-made, are amazing and real. If you don’t look up, you might just stay down on the ground with which the familiar and past are so welcoming and real.

It’s different up there. Rainy and cloudy and snowy days don’t exist. Only sunshine and blue skies and white puffy clouds so close you could touch them. That magic will never really die. No matter how many frequent flyer miles pile up, that part of the travelling experience really make you feel closer to God.

The lights we see up there were created long before our planet even knew she’d departed from the Sun. It’s awe inspiring when we think about it, and look up feeling small.

G’night All.
Jimmy

Dear Jimmy,
No one cares about your pathetic existence. People are dying right now in Iraq and all you do is bitch and moan about nothingness. Your life as you call it is devoid of meaning.
Get some help. And stop annoying people.
Sincerely,
Annoyed

Dear Annoyed,
Do I know you really well? Because you seem to know me pretty damn well. Talk about putting the Nail on the Head.

Also, thanks for emailing me instead of posting that. The extra click and send really shows you care. You cared enough to write, which I appreciate.
Sincerely,
Jimmy

Dear Jimmy,
How come you’re not doing comedy anymore? And why do you alwayz talk about yourself and your goals and shit? You used to talk about the stuff in your life and make me laugh. Now you’re like a boring doctor Phil. Be funny again, or I’m gonna not read this shit.

Sincerely,
I’m serious. I won’t read this shit.

Dear I’m serious. I won’t read this shit,

Thanks for the feedback, and the cursing. Nothing adds to blog popularity like a few good shits. I’m not doing comedy because I’ve been really busy - No shit. Doctor Phil is an ugly dude with a hot wife who’s got a really nice rack. Not Too Shabby. Furthermore, his monetary wealth is something to aspire to. Now if only Oprah Winfrey had a show on whiny unattractive balding bloggers…

Seriously,
Jimmy

Dear Jimmy,

Do people really comment on your blog? It’s ok, but not really worth commenting about.

Sincerely,
No Comment

Dear No Comment,

People do comment. I usually remove the comments because most of them end up spamming my fair readers, or causing some weird malicious code to run on their boxes. You can e-mail me, as most people do, at mcse03@myway.com.
Thanks for not commenting,
Jimmy

And finally, my favorite reader response:

Dear Jimmy,

Did you go to high school with me? I’m 27, and I graduated in 1995 at (Jimmy’s High School). I’ve got 34DD breasts and can show you how to help make your penis harder longer! Click on the link at the end of this message to see me, and find out about how you could benefit from the closest biological match to Viagra on the planet! As an added bonus, I’ll send you my picture and a free video with your first 3 month supply!
-Spamming Bitch

Dear Spamming Bitch,

I don’t think I went to high school with you. I would have definitely remembered you. I’m curious as to why you’re sending Jimmy an email when you’re obviously out of jimmy’s league.

I’ll take the video though,

Jimmy

Why can’t I just be like normal people and turn the damn air on?

As kids we thought our neighbors were weird because even on hot, hot days they’d neglect air conditioning. They were frugal older folks who grew up during the Depression. There’s so much there to learn and gather that I’m suddenly motivated to read the Greatest Generation by Tom Brokaw. So I’m stubborn.

I hate when I go off on something heavy like my last post. Coming off that is such a huge undertaking that I feel as if I need to ‘ease’ into it. I really shouldn’t feel that need to get so deep about things.

None of you fair readers really give a shit anyways.. Sure, you want to see how this story ends, which, like yours it eventually will, but it’s that subconscious, “Am I here? Am I normal?” questioning that this blog indeed helps to bounce off your brain like a ricocheting bullet off a wall that really introduces or keeps you here.

I think if I were to advertise my blog as “Spam & Pop-Up free” I’d get more hits. Then, though I realize it’s summer and who takes the time to read other people’s blogs in the summer? God, Jimmy. Get a life.

Actually I have, or am, rather. I came to this conclusion while doing a badly needed cleanup of this Ol’ apartment. Maybe it was the BON AMI fumes, but I aquired the following convictions:
A. Bon AMI can clean just about anything.
B. Aluminum Sinks rust? WTF?
C. I hate cleaning showers
D. I need a life.

So, I’m going to Europe in a couple of weeks for work. How cool is that?! I’m totally jet-set, and I didn’t even notice it until I was on the phone with my mom (okay, deduct 5 Have-A-Life Cool Points) and was asking for various birth locations for my Passport (add on 2 Cool points). So anyway, she asks me to call her back that night, and I said I’d call her from my hotel, because I’d be in DC. And THAT, my fair readers, is the moment the realization swept over my being like a Grande Drip rush after a 14 hour hibernation sleep-in that indeed, I have joined the upper ranks of air travellers.

Ironically, the website I had initially planned for my blog was going to be this travel journal, and I still may actually be able to pull it off if I play my cards right. How nifty is that?

In other news, I’m watching cable now more than ever. It’s a drug, I’m addicted. Is it just me, or did Suze Orman go out and buy herself a personality? I keep waiting for the day that the cameraman loses control to the Minds of Men and finally displays some cleavage. Come on, you know you’re at Least curious.

See, that’s the other thing. I’m concerned about Maria Barituromo. She’s still The Hottest Woman on Television, but I’m not getting the “I know Finance” attitude that I saw in epic pieces she did - IE - her Sandy Weill interview a few years back.

Damn I watch a lot of CNBC.

I’ve taken to taping Kudlow and Cramer. Is that an addiction calling?

Also on the Loss Expectation front, a quote that someone shared with me at work that I equated to Jack Welsh actually equates to a WWE wrestler. My sadness in this discovery, however, was overshadowed by the devaluation of the individual who owned the quote in the first place.

Reading Benny Franklin’s latest biog and it’s pretty interesting. Also hopping back into Sedaris’ book, but I’m getting deja vu reading a few of his stories, which is disappointing.

I’ve got Altiris training this coming week, and I’m toying with the Idea of Not Shaving. This may be a kneejerk reaction to my perception that more hair is evacuating the upper floors of Jimmy Tower, but then I could be overly paranoid. Being up at 1AM on a Sunday doesn’t help.

I got word that Doug Coupland’s new book is due out sometime in September.. Eleanor Rigby.. Looks promising. But then I went to his website and read about Terry Fox and the pending Doug book on his life and I was suddenly saddened and awed by the scope of this individual’s contribution to humanity.

If/when I get up to heaven, I’d love to interview Fox and Tillman. Unbelievable heroes.

Happy 26th Birthday to My Brother Dave! You rock, little bro!

We’ll leave it on that note.

If you don’t hear from me, have a great week.

On this night, 3 years ago,
A conversation was had with a friend I know.
The words she imparted had been heard times before,
With this one last time, they’d be shared no more.

Because the despair that was mine and the fears that I felt,
Went off of my soul and did indeed melt
Into the blind intuition of God-trust
when in through Him all things must

Pass Onward and upward to the heavens.

If you’ve been to a meeting or spoken with friends,
The journey they’ll speak of never really ends.
Each day is a new one unlike the one before,
with so much to do, so very much more.

Making up lost time is the debt we all share,
those in the shadows and those out here
in the light of clean and clarity of time passing through,
You don’t know where you’ll end up but now it’s coming to

When you realize the gifts and abundance that have arrived in such a short, short time.

And with humility and justness and ambitions running strong,
You work harder than ever, no day can be too long.
For if you are to go farther and grab a bigger piece of the cup,
You must always be restless, look nowhere but up.

Taking this brief moment to reflect on it all,
The really big changes, and the ones that seem small,
I realize this one thing this change that I’ve made,
Lead to the others which tint my life a brighter shade.

-End of Poem.

I took my last drink 3 years ago today. Who I am today, and the things I’ve done in the last 3 years are so outside of where I thought my life could be that I can’t even describe it.

I thank God for His grace in getting me and keeping me here…. for putting the people and events in my life to create such a reality.

Things could have been so different. So much so that if I stray from my faith, it will keep me up at night.

I remember the last moment, which is odd. It was in my East Cleveland place and it was a bottle of Riunite, and I finished it before I hung up the phone, and it was in one of my clear short glasses.

Thanks for everything world, fair reader, and G man. Thanks Renee for being there at that moment, for being present and being a friend. You downplay the significance of our conversation, but I hold you responsible for a large part of that moment, and am forever in your debt for that.

I’ve got work to do, so fair reader, say a prayer for those who haven’t come to such conclusions, those in my family and yours.

It’s funny, one of my aunt’s asked me, “How’d you do it?”
I replied to her matter of factly that you need to sort of lose everything. In that moment I was very convinced of that.

Blah. or, blog. G’night.

Some day, I’ll really have time to be sick, and enjoy the process of eventually getting better. This was the realization I made at about 4 AM today. It was still dark out, I was stretched out in bed. Having foregone the nicety of Kleenex, I mean - facial tissue, I lie wheezing with my roll of trusty toilet paper at my side.

It’s here that I’d like to interject that it was Quilted Northern, or that other rippled one that’s nice and soft, but alas, it was the cheap 2 ply Aldi brand, which, I must admit, gets the job done nicely.

I finished Cisco class last night, and got a class completion certificate despite the fact that I missed the two classes prior to circumstances beyond my control (sickness and unplanned Washington DC travel, respectively.)

It was a nice night, and I listened to the Cleveland orchestra (Dork!) on WCPN/NPR (Super Dork!) while driving home from class around 10. I was shocked that I could still see that sliver of light out to the west where the airplanes were coming from.

It was a quiet ride. One of those introspective moments in a collection of introspection that, I’m realizing, precedes any certification-related undertaking.

I take test 1 of 2 for the CCNA on Tuesday. It’s called Intro, will probably be pretty undifficult, but I really want to hone in on the fundamentals to make the gargantua to follow if not easier to bare, than at least palpable. (Because we all know there’s just not enough papyrus-friendly gargantuas out there..)
But I digress.

Work is driving me crazy. As I achieve more of my goals, and become more, it seems as if people are becoming more transparent. Motivations, character, all of that fun gray-area stuff just doesn’t seem to be so lately.

Weird side effect, eh?

Anyhew, have a safe holiday weekend!
Jimmy

Work’s driving me crazy, as more and more people become more transparent in their