Jimmy.Brainflush.com

Dear Jimmy,
No one cares about your pathetic existence. People are dying right now in Iraq and all you do is bitch and moan about nothingness. Your life as you call it is devoid of meaning.
Get some help. And stop annoying people.
Sincerely,
Annoyed

Dear Annoyed,
Do I know you really well? Because you seem to know me pretty damn well. Talk about putting the Nail on the Head.

Also, thanks for emailing me instead of posting that. The extra click and send really shows you care. You cared enough to write, which I appreciate.
Sincerely,
Jimmy

Dear Jimmy,
How come you’re not doing comedy anymore? And why do you alwayz talk about yourself and your goals and shit? You used to talk about the stuff in your life and make me laugh. Now you’re like a boring doctor Phil. Be funny again, or I’m gonna not read this shit.

Sincerely,
I’m serious. I won’t read this shit.

Dear I’m serious. I won’t read this shit,

Thanks for the feedback, and the cursing. Nothing adds to blog popularity like a few good shits. I’m not doing comedy because I’ve been really busy - No shit. Doctor Phil is an ugly dude with a hot wife who’s got a really nice rack. Not Too Shabby. Furthermore, his monetary wealth is something to aspire to. Now if only Oprah Winfrey had a show on whiny unattractive balding bloggers…

Seriously,
Jimmy

Dear Jimmy,

Do people really comment on your blog? It’s ok, but not really worth commenting about.

Sincerely,
No Comment

Dear No Comment,

People do comment. I usually remove the comments because most of them end up spamming my fair readers, or causing some weird malicious code to run on their boxes. You can e-mail me, as most people do, at mcse03@myway.com.
Thanks for not commenting,
Jimmy

And finally, my favorite reader response:

Dear Jimmy,

Did you go to high school with me? I’m 27, and I graduated in 1995 at (Jimmy’s High School). I’ve got 34DD breasts and can show you how to help make your penis harder longer! Click on the link at the end of this message to see me, and find out about how you could benefit from the closest biological match to Viagra on the planet! As an added bonus, I’ll send you my picture and a free video with your first 3 month supply!
-Spamming Bitch

Dear Spamming Bitch,

I don’t think I went to high school with you. I would have definitely remembered you. I’m curious as to why you’re sending Jimmy an email when you’re obviously out of jimmy’s league.

I’ll take the video though,

Jimmy